Tag Archive | Wilson Wisdom

Wilson Wisdom – Autism Awareness

img_0770My son made me smile this week, something he does regularly, but this smile – this one is still in my heart. I’m filled to bursting with this smile because he took a huge step, he summoned his courage and he faced the unknown to do something he’s been talking about doing for a some time now.

My son is my hero, I’ll tell you that about him first. In his 27 years, he has taught me more than I could have ever dreamed while I was busy teaching him. His name is Wilson. I knew almost right away he was something special, it took nine years for that something special to be diagnosed, autism.

Our journey together has been amazing.

As he grew older, he began to develop phenomenal insights about autism. His desire to share those insights with others grew into a passion for spreading autism awareness. One of the ways he did this was to create a Cafepress store called Wilson Wisdom. I was an admin for a large online autism group, and he regularly dictated things for me to share with them, he answered questions the members asked, and truly helped so many peek into the world of autism.

The last few years, he’s been making autism awareness posts on Facebook, this week, he decided to make his first video, and I simply cannot stop smiling. I have a feeling once he gets used to it, he is going to do just what he told me he would do when he was younger, change the world one person at a time.

Sharing this smile today for The Weekly Smile at Trent’s World (the blog) 

Wilson Wisdom for Autism Awareness


I am so proud of my son, it takes a lot of courage to put yourself out there like this and I hope he continues to do so . . . He has amazing insights and so much Wilson Wisdom to share.

Doing autism awareness videos is something he’s thought of for some time now, I had no ide he was going to take such a monumental step like this, I am overwhelmed, and as always, so very proud of him.

Please remember he is speaking from his own experiences and sharing what he has learned, and is in the process of learning, throughout his life. He understands everyone with autism is unique, and while he may sometimes say ‘all’, he is speaking about things that are very often common among autistics.

Your comments and encouragement are appreciated 😊

In regard to functioning labels – Autism

Autism

Functioning Labels & Autism

When we use functioning labels, we’re telling the world a half truth, and our children are often held to certain standards they cannot always rise to meet, or held down by expectations set too low.

I used to use the term high functioning when talking to people about my boys, both at varying degrees on the autism spectrum, until I slowly began to realize I was setting them up for certain failures and disappointments in doing so.

High functioning does not mean their lives aren’t difficult and confusing in many ways. It does not mean they do not struggle, in fact, it minimizes their struggle.

The term low functioning in regard to others on the spectrum can lead people to expect less than they should from them. The term low functioning does not reflect how capable someone may be, in fact, it minimizes their capabilities.

In my mind, I was trying, in the simplest terms, to tell people my children had many abilities some on the spectrum may not. They speak, though neither developed spontaneous, conversational speech until they were around five years old.

They are able to express themselves beautifully and articulately, but it took a lot of hard work before they could, and while they still struggle at times with the semantics and pragmatics of speech, they have a voice.

They struggle with sensory issues and learning deficits, they battle anxieties and obsessive thought patterns and routines. Years of special education, speech, occupational, and physical therapy have filled in many of the gaps and given them tools to self regulate and maintain what they have learned. Most of the time.

While they can remember complex ideas they often need reminders and help to accomplish the simplest of tasks. Some days they are high functioning. Some days they are in the middle, and some days they are low.

Autism is a spectrum in the broadest sense, encompassing all levels of functionality for every individual diagnosed, there is a vast spectrum within each one of them.

My boys are now adults, amazing, wonderful, young men with many gifts and abilities, but they are not yet capable of being on their own. They may never be fully able to without some sort of assistance, maybe they will. I do know that when they spread their wings I am not going to clip them by giving them a label that tells the world they can soar when they are just learning how to fly . . .

Crystal R. Cook

Is it really the least restrictive environment? Special education vs Mainstream

*The following is based on personal experience and observation both with my own children and those I have advocated for in the past. I realize there are indeed success stories involving a smooth and beneficial transition from a special education setting to a general education one. Unfortunately, there are many more examples of the system failing.

The methodology behind mainstreaming special needs students into the general education classroom is too often poorly thought out and implemented. It takes too broad of an approach to the special educational needs of many students, and in doing so, only serves to hinder, not help.

Special education was created for a reason. For a population of students with different needs than many of their peers, different abilities which sometimes require a separate and unique forum in which they can learn, an environment better suited to meet their needs. The school system has been caught up in a whirlwind of state standards and testing, coupled with the need to be politically correct, it spells disaster for many of our children.

Over the years I have seen many school districts systematically take away the services our children need and are entitled to. Parents have to fight and go through due process hearings and mediation to get their children the educational services they are by law entitled to receive. The need for socialization has replaced the need for academic achievement. There are many ways to find a social balance between the mainstream and special education programs.

The term least restrictive environment is thrown around quite liberally to loosely justify taking aspects of special education away. The least restrictive environment is supposed to be just that, an environment in which a students social, emotional and educational needs are met without depriving them or restricting them from growth and development at their own pace.

In reality, what many educators are deeming to be the least restrictive environment for a learning disabled or mentally challenged student is, in fact, often the most restrictive and detrimental environment they could be placed in. The very best general education teacher will not be able to meet the needs of a student or students who require a different approach, one they most likely haven’t received the training required to teach. This only leads to frustration for the teacher as well as her students.

Many classrooms themselves are simply too overwhelming for the special needs student. The room may be too colorful, too noisy or have too much movement. The fluorescent lighting itself can cause havoc for a student with sensory integration disorder. 1 in 68 children have been diagnosed with an autistic spectrum disorder. Just those few things I’ve mentioned can be too much for them to handle.

If a students learning challenges are mild enough to be placed in the general education setting and they are thriving, then they are in the right place. If they are not thriving however, if they are overwhelmed and cannot keep up, or they are ostracized because of their differences, then they should not be forced to endure it for the sake of satisfying those who have jumped up on a soapbox of denial. We cannot make them fit in or adjust. The misguided notion which says we are preparing them for the real world by trying to assimilate them into a society that may or may not accept them, only proves to make the transition even more difficult for them.

Many mainstreamed children with special needs leave school feeling ashamed of who they are, feeling they were not good enough. How is that going to help them in this real world everyone keeps talking about? More and more students with special needs are failing to reach graduation, they are held back or worse, many drop out of school entirely. They are not being given the opportunity to learn many of the things they could be, and should be learning in a proper educational setting.

I find it odd that gifted children are given their very own society. There are advanced placement classes specifically for those with academic prowess which surpasses their peers. Why are they there? Because they learn things differently than the other students. Because the regular education setting did not provide them with enough of what they needed to maintain and challenge them. Why do we justify the segregation of these children while forcing others to remain in settings not suited for what is best for them?

Special education should be special education, separate and different from the mainstream, but there should be a bridge for those who are able and ready to cross over it.

As a mother of four children with varying degrees of special needs I have been involved in this debate for years. Since my oldest was two and half years old to be precise. He is now nearing 25 years old. I was trapped on the special education roller coaster for many years, and I must say, I did not enjoy the ride.

I think it best if the last word comes from someone other than myself, I would like to share with you the opinion of a brilliant, young autistic boy . . .

“It is not easy to be placed in a classroom full of kids that are not nice to you, who are sometimes actually mean. They don’t do it when the teachers can see or hear them and for some reason they are believed when they deny the deed. It is not easy to learn from a teacher who does not know how I learn and does not have the time to learn how to teach me. It is not easy to be in a classroom that is filled with colors and movement and noise and bright lights and constant changes.

A classroom best suited for me and many other students is one that is calming. One that does not display too many decorations and the lights don’t hurt my eyes or my ears. The fluorescent lighting in most classrooms make sounds that not everyone can hear. I need a classroom that has stability and structure and I need a teacher that knows the unique way I learn and has the time and training to teach me. I need a teacher that will tell me if there is going to be a change like a substitute or if the furniture will be arranged differently. These things are more important than being put in a classroom that I shouldn’t be in because someone who does not know what it is like to live with these things says I should be.

I resent the idea that these experts are trying to integrate us in with normal kids. Neurotypical does not mean normal. There is no such thing as normal. I do not truly care about what an expert thinks is best for me, I care about what really is best for me and for others just like me. I was in a regular education class and it was like daily torture. Thankfully my mother saw very quickly that something needed to be changed and starting fighting for those changes. I was able to go to a school with teachers who knew how to teach me, that were trained in the different abilities of their students.

There is room for socialization outside of school if we want it. That is something experts do not seem to understand. We DON’T always want it. You look at us walking alone on the playground talking to ourselves or stimming, you see us eating alone at lunch and think that we must be sad and lonely. Don’t you see that it is a choice for many of us? The schools need to stop taking away the freedom of kids like me. I will graduate from high school this year and I plan on continuing to change the way the special education system is structured because it is flawed. Thank you for your time.”

Wilson Cook

My son was 17 years old when he wrote this. He was completely removed from mainstream education in the 9th grade, he attended a special needs charter school through graduation. I attribute much of the success we have had to those special education teachers who took the time to really help him. My son was non-verbal as a child. I was told he would never learn and now he is the one teaching the lessons.

Crystal R. Cook

He is changing the world every day.

imageOn page 26 in the book Chicken Soup for the Preteen Soul (Published in 2000), you will find a little piece of my son’s heart. It is his perfect ending to the statement “If I could change the world for the better I would . . . “

He found the call for submissions on a website and sent his thoughts in. His quote was chosen for inclusion and he received an autographed copy of the book and a check for twenty dollars, he was on top of the world, published and rich at 9 years old.

So, on page 26, right below Justin Timberlake and a little girl named Scarlett, you will find these words describing how my son would change the world for the better . . .

“Help people realize that people like me who learn differently and do things differently than them are still really the same underneath it all. We want to be liked and smiled at.

Wilson Cook, nine

This was the same year he received his official diagnosis of Autism. I hope his wish for a better world comes true.

Credit where it’s due.

* Update – The page owner responded kindly, offering to remove or give him credit. I want his words, his message out there . . . I just don’t want someone claiming them as their own. Her response left me feeling a bit better about people, I suppose part of me was expecting the resistance or rudeness I have encountered trying to remove his work from other sites, one even selling his design as their own. She was very much the opposite and I am thankful for it . . . 

My sweet friend, Kathie, sent me a link this afternoon referencing an image someone claimed to have created, a very familiar image to most anyone who knows us. It was among the first creations of what was to become Wilson Wisdom.

I realized this kid of mine had much to share with the world, a message of acceptance and understanding for the autistic community, so I started transcribing his words, sharing them wherever I could. We eventually began putting some of his insights and wisdoms on CafePress in hopes of spreading his message.

It worked. Labels Are For Soup Cans, Autism Is A Diagnosis, can be found in many places around the web, unfortunately, unless you type it into a search engine you wouldn’t know who said it. You can enter Wilson Wisdom or the Qwiet Muse with the word autism and you’ll find it though.

Hindsight is 20/20, cliché, but factual. We didn’t put his name, or Wilson Wisdom on some of those first little tidbits we shared with the world. Now, sadly, I have seen several used on websites, even some used for profit, without giving my son the credit he so very much deserves.

People who claim ownership for something clearly not their own should be ashamed . . . It’s sad, but an unfortunate reality.

At least we know his words are out there, hopefully touching and changing hearts and lives.

I shared the following in a previous blog post, I feel compelled to share his analogy once again.

Wilson Wisdom

I have yet to find a downside to what so many refer to as a label. It is, in fact, a diagnosis, something many tend to overlook. My oldest son will soon be twenty-five years old, he is most likely the wisest person I will ever be blessed to have known in this life. He lives his life on the autistic spectrum; he has a thing or two to say about labels . . .

“Labels are for soup cans, diagnoses are for people, but they both serve the same purpose. They tell you what is inside and how to properly prepare it. If you have five cans on a shelf and one does not have a label, you are going to use the four cans that are labeled first because you know what they are. You know if they will need certain ingredients or special preparation. Sometimes the can missing its label never gets used. You put new cans in front of it and it remains there. When you do finally look inside to see what it is, you’ll see that it was something you really wanted, but it’s too late to use it. It will never be what it was supposed to be.

Now instead of a soup can, imagine a child who is different from the others, but no one knows why. The child gets overlooked and ignored because no one knows what to do with him, how to teach him, how to prepare him for the future because the diagnosis, or label that should tell everyone how to do these things was never given to that child. So they remain in the background becoming more and more lost. When they get older and someone comes along and decides to find out what is going on inside that child, it’s too late. The education and the therapy they needed were never given to them and they will never be what they were supposed to be.”

Wilson Cook

When my son wrote this I was in awe at his insight, he was eighteen at the time. I know if I’d been afraid of that proverbial label, he would not have become the amazing young man he is. I was told he would never talk, never learn. I listen to him speak and I read the words he writes and I know I did the right thing for him. The one little word, autistic, on a simple piece of paper changed the course of his life for the better.

Two of my children require very specific labels if they are to get the services they need and deserve, both have been blessed with the gift of a proper diagnosis. One of my children faces many, many challenges. Before I had names for those challenges he was considered a problem child. He was thought to be rude, lazy and was accused of ignoring his teachers. They told me he didn’t want to learn. The truth was, he did want to learn, they just didn’t know how to teach him.

Children do not receive the occupational therapy, speech therapy and specialized education they may need simply because we ask for it. Even if all involved agree, services are still withheld for lack of a professional diagnosis. Call it a label; call it a diagnosis, in the end all that matters is your child. You want the best for them; you want their futures to be bright and filled with possibilities.

Many children never reach their full potential because society was too afraid to label them.

Wilson Wisdom can be found at http://www.cafepress.com/wilsonwisdom

Labels go on soup cans, autism is a diagnosis.

image

I have yet to find a downside to what so many refer to as a label. It is, in fact, a diagnosis, something many tend to overlook. My oldest son will soon be twenty-five years old, he is most likely the wisest person I will ever be blessed to have known in this life. He lives his life on the autistic spectrum; he has a thing or two to say about labels . . .

“Labels are for soup cans, diagnoses are for people, but they both serve the same purpose. They tell you what is inside and how to properly prepare it. If you have five cans on a shelf and one does not have a label, you are going to use the four cans that are labeled first because you know what they are. You know if they will need certain ingredients or special preparation. Sometimes the can missing its label never gets used. You put new cans in front of it and it remains there. When you do finally look inside to see what it is, you’ll see that it was something you really wanted, but it’s too late to use it. It will never be what it was supposed to be.

Now instead of a soup can, imagine a child who is different from the others, but no one knows why. The child gets overlooked and ignored because no one knows what to do with him, how to teach him, how to prepare him for the future because the diagnosis, or label that should tell everyone how to do these things was never given to that child. So they remain in the background becoming more and more lost. When they get older and someone comes along and decides to find out what is going on inside that child, it’s too late. The education and the therapy they needed were never given to them and they will never be what they were supposed to be.”

Wilson Cook

When my son wrote this I was in awe at his insight, he was eighteen at the time. I know if I’d been afraid of that proverbial label, he would not have become the amazing young man he is. I was told he would never talk, never learn. I listen to him speak and I read the words he writes and I know I did the right thing for him. The one little word, autistic, on a simple piece of paper changed the course of his life for the better.

Two of my children require very specific labels if they are to get the services they need and deserve, both have been blessed with the gift of a proper diagnosis. One of my children faces many, many challenges. Before I had names for those challenges he was considered a problem child. He was thought to be rude, lazy and was accused of ignoring his teachers. They told me he didn’t want to learn. The truth was, he did want to learn, they just didn’t know how to teach him.

Children do not receive the occupational therapy, speech therapy and specialized education they may need simply because we ask for it. Even if all involved agree, services are still withheld for lack of a professional diagnosis. Call it a label; call it a diagnosis, in the end all that matters is your child. You want the best for them; you want their futures to be bright and filled with possibilities.

Many children never reach their full potential because society was too afraid to label them.

Wilson Wisdom can be found at http://www.cafepress.com/wilsonwisdom