My precious boy – if it were in my power to spare you this heartache, I would not do so. I love you far too much to deprive you of this pain.
Source: If I Could Spare You This Pain | Mamalode
Sharing a piece of my heart on Mamalode this month . . .
My favorite line . . .
I have beautifully worn and lovingly well-read copy of Ernest Hemingway’s The Old man and the Sea, every now and again, I thumb through the pages just to read these words – Sometimes I need a reminder, sometimes we all do . . .
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Crystal, poem by Crystal Cook (SAME NAME Poetry and Prose Series)
Hers was the longest, the best, and most beautiful . . . Silver Birch Press
Crystal
by Crystal Cook
Her image was taped up high
on the wall in the record store (you remember those, don’t you?)
It was her hair that caught my eye,
it was was lovely and brown
and ten thousand times longer than mine.
It was the seventies (you remember those, don’t you?)
and it was all about the hair.
The longer the better
and hers was the longest,
the best,
and most beautiful.
Her name was Crystal Gayle
and I thought it must be fate
that she and I would share a name.
I wanted to be
like her one day
with hair down to my feet,
and while I waited
and wished it would grow
I wore my nightgowns upon my head
like cotton wigs,
flowery fabric trailing behind me
wherever I’d go.
I listened to her songs
on the radio
pretending she was me
and I was her
View original post 240 more words
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Directionless in the Blogosphere
I write.
I write poems and I write prose. I write about love and anxiety and autism. I write about parenting and love. I write serious and I write silly.
I don’t have a niche. I don’t have a direction. I don’t have a thing.
I just write.
I’m not a mommy blogger or a fashion blogger. I’m not a mental health blogger or any kind of blogger. I just have a blog.
It took me a long time to reach this place, the place of sharing the words I have written, and in reality, I’ve not shared nearly as much as I one day hope to. I’m not filled to the brim with confidence like some seem to be. Each time I hit that publish button I’m filled with a sense of dread. It wasn’t good enough to be read. I make myself do it though because the words inside of me want more release than I’ve allowed them.
I’ve been their captor for so long, relegating them to spend their entire existence tucked away between journal covers and computer files, but still . . . it scares me to set them free.
As this new year approached I told myself I was going to let them go, let them flow, and let them fly.
But I haven’t. Not yet. I’ve held them and hidden them for such a long time now, I’m not certain how. I’ve only loosened the leash I’ve used to keep them tightly tethered to my soul.
I should give myself more credit. I’ve taken steps, baby steps. I took a leap of faith and started this blog. I took a few more and sent my words to be considered for publication outside of this little world I’ve begun to create and they were welcomed and sprouted wings of their own.
Still . . .
I’m not sure. Do I find a focus? My thoughts are scattered and random and I don’t think I can rein them in. Truthfully, I don’t really want to. I admire those who write with singular purpose, I am in awe of their ability to do so. I’ve never been the fitting in type, and I suppose I’ll never be. I guess I’ll just keep doing what I’m doing, each day trying to do a little more, each day just being me.
Directionless in the blogosphere . . . but happily enjoying the scenery.
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2015 in review
Can’t wait to see what next year brings! Thank you to each and every one of you who clicked your way to The Qwiet Muse . . .
The WordPress.com stats helper monkeys prepared a 2015 annual report for this blog.
Here’s an excerpt:
The Louvre Museum has 8.5 million visitors per year. This blog was viewed about 1,500,000 times in 2015. If it were an exhibit at the Louvre Museum, it would take about 64 days for that many people to see it.
Click here to see the complete report.
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This door is not for you . . .
I am thankful for doors that never opened and for the ones I had to close. Some of those doors were beautiful and I desperately wanted to see what was on the other side. Sometimes, I would catch a glimpse behind them when someone else went through, but I could never follow, they said,
“This door is not for you.”
Some of the doors had broken locks and I would tiptoe in, but they were cold and dark inside, I felt lost once I was in. I left the rooms behind those doors and never entered them again.
There were other doors, some plain and uninviting, but a lovely light crept through their cracks and I was drawn to them, and when I asked if I may enter, they opened wide and welcomed me. I worried if I stepped outside I might never get back in.
“Don’t be silly, don’t you see?” said the doors, “Your heart has always been the key.”
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Just write the words and everything is fine – everything is fine.
Everything is fine.
It’s good.
In fact, perhaps, just maybe, there’s a possibility things are even great – but I cannot say for certain for my heart, my heart is beating far too fast, so very, very fast. My thoughts are swiftly swirling, swirling, swirling into a vortex, into a void – spinning fast and furious, and then faster, faster still – pulling apart with magnificent, terrifying ease, the finely woven tapestry, the tapestry of * me *. Threads of my reality are fraying, strings and strands and tendrils of . . . sanity? being swallowed by a nothingness I swear is all too real.
Silly, silly girl. I know. Everything is fine.
Tell it to my heart, it’s beating faster still.
Everything is fine. I must write the words to make them real. Words. Words. Which ones?
The right ones, the right ones of course.
Words. I must simply write the words because maybe things are great and I need do nothing more than read them to remind my beating (still too quickly) heart . . . remind my heart to tell me, tell me everything is fine.
Write the words and swallow half a little pill . . . write them, read them, once and then again, and then again once more.
The tempest quells, the words prevail – the words prevail once more.
Everything is fine.
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Letting go – again – to start anew . . . 2016
Letting go
of fear,
of doubt –
(again)
of what if,
what was,
and what is yet to be.
Letting go of all the
things
I’ve let grab hold of me.
(again)
Casting off the shackles
I’ve somehow bound myself within,
shedding and discarding
them like forgiven sin.
Once more, again –
the slate is cleansed
with freshly fallen tears,
of mourning,
rejoicing,
of hellos
and of goodbyes,
of memories and moments
falling from my eyes.
(again)
And lo, a new year dawns
when the last tear
is shed and wiped away,
another new beginning
ushers in a brand new day.
(again)
Crystal R. Cook
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Writers – You NEED this book! Fall in Love With Writing.
If you’re looking for the perfect, last-minute gift for the writer in your life, (or for yourself) this is it. I am currently devouring each word. Usually, I finish a book before recommending it, but I knew just a few pages in that anyone who has ever sat down and put pen to page was going to fall in love with it as quickly as I did.
Juni Desireé has compiled a phenomenal collection of quotes and anecdotes from writers of all ages from around the world about one of my favorite things to both read and write about ~ writing. They share from the heart their love of writing; why they write, what the written word means to them – they encourage and uplift and inspire. I am honored to be among these many voices, I must admit to feeling almost unworthy of sharing the page with them.
Already, I feel empowered and inspired to write, write, write.
I have so much more to say about this beautiful book, but for now I must resume my reading. I simply couldn’t wait to share.
“Whether you’re an established writer or just thinking about giving writing a go, this book will inspire you to write for the love of writing. With over 200 people from around the world sharing their love of the writing, Fall in Love with Writing will encourage you that anyone can write. You don’t need eloquent words or literary prose; all you need are your own words on the page to share your stories. Packed full of writing advice, prompts, and examples of people’s raw and honest writing, this book will give you a taste of the writing world and lots of ideas to get you started and keep on going. May you fall in love with writing.”
Fall in Love with Writing by Juni Desireé
Click the link to order your Kindle copy right now!
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Meet and Greet 12/18
Finding new and amazing bloggers is a blessing . . .
The Qwiet Muse 